We’ve been hearing about Godfall for a while now. It’s supposedly a hot next gen launch title being published by Gearbox that’s all about stabbing and looting. Judging by the title, it seems like some gods will take a nasty tumble at some point. Aside from that, we can’t get into more detailed description. When we even try to conjure up an image of Godfall in our heads, all we see are bright flashes and characters that look like they got lost on the way to Destiny 2.
We’re skeptical about this game. It’s so unspectacular and derivative that it can’t possibly be real. We don’t know how or why, but we’re certain that Godfall is actually from an alternate universe where life is a crime procedural.
Godfall? More like God-Fake!
Seriously try to think about Godfall. Does anything pop into your head? Memorable scenery? Interesting gameplay? Maybe a cool enemy? Nothing? That’s what we thought. Despite being a title developed for the next generation of consoles, every video of Godfall has left little to no impression on us. Even after watching the trailer above we still can’t recall a single thing about it.
Going by the footage, we know there are melee weapons and fancy outfits. The gameplay is reminiscent of other third-person action games like 2018’s God Of War. And it is very colorful, we’ll give it that.
But that’s it. That’s all we got. Everything else about this game screams generic action title. So generic that we can’t believe that this is a genuine game. There’s got to be some kind of scheme going on here. Especially since this is being published by Gearbox, which means that everyone’s favorite CEO/amateur magician/con-man Randy Pitchford is involved.
There’ s plenty of dirt on Gearbox. Pitchford is notorious for some rather unsavory activities in the past. Taking high bonuses for himself, screwing employees out of money, leaving valuable and potentially illegal USB sticks behind at Medieval Times restaurants, etc. There was also the time that they diverted funds away from Aliens: Colonial Marines to help increase the budget for Borderlands 2. That led to Colonial Marines’ development being farmed out to other companies and the final product ending up as total garbage. That got Gearbox in hot water with Sega leading to a messy lawsuit. And now, this same company is telling us that it’s helping to make a next-gen title? Yeah, sure, we’re not buying it.
There’s something fishy about Godfall. It reminds us of those fake games you would see characters in prestige television dramas play when Sony or Microsoft paid for some blatant product placement. Remember when Jesse from Breaking Bad played Rage with a magical PS3 gun controller that never existed? Or when Jennifer Love-Hewitt got sucked into a wannabe Second Life clone on The Ghost Whisperer (also, does anyone remember The Ghost Whisperer?)
Look at the developer, Counterplay Games. Where did they come from? They have no history prior to this ambitious project. What if they’re just a company set up by Gearbox to develop a game that’s never intended to release? We don’t even know who’s on this team aside from some guy named Keith Lee, which sounds like a fake name. Just look at the name Counterplay Games. Doesn’t that sound awfully close to Counterfeit Games?! Suspicious!
The only logical explanation is that Gearbox and Pitchford must have come up with some nefarious plan to make a profit off a fake game called Godfall. It would be easy enough to do. Set up a false studio, make enough footage to look like an actual game, and get Sony and Epic to fork over money for exclusivity rights. Then they take all that moolah, cancel the game, close the studio, and claim they got taken for a ride by some deceitful developers. Meanwhile, they’re got that cash locked up in an offshore bank account and nobody is the wiser.
To be fair, this would be a pretty crappy plan since there would be some sort of legal repercussions. But this is Randy Pitchford we’re talking about. Do you think he’s the type of guy to think that far ahead? We doubt it. He might even take the ill-gotten gains from this Godfall fiasco and pump it into another game like he did with Colonial Marines. Maybe this is how Gearbox funds Battleborn 2! Who knows?!
Better Luck Next Time Randy!
We’re onto you Pitchford. We know a swindle when we see it. You and your fake game are as obvious as your terrible magic. No one’s gonna fall for this Godfall mess and when the truth comes to light you’ll be finished! Don’t believe the lies people! This game’s a racket, a hoodwink, a flimsy flavorless floundering flimflam!
Unless of course, Godfall does turn out to be a real game. In that case…Well it just doesn’t look very good, does it?
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